Well it's been a week since I last posted anything but there's a really good reason for that! I can only update this at work and the end of last week was too busy to allow me any spare time to get on the web - and this weekend has been interesting to say the least!

I did meet girl 3 on Sunday but due to person in flat downstairs (Grrrrrr) I got no sleep whatsoever on Friday night so ended up oversleeping and being half an hour late to meet her for lunch (plus was still half-asleep anyway). I don't think it went all that well. It wasn't a disaster but when you part and someone says that they'll "email you in the week" it's normally a good indication that you haven't exactly blown them away.

This means I may have a vacancy coming available for the position of girl 3. Applications to the usual address....

The reason why I got no sleep was that the guy downstairs has built a lean-to in the back garden (and so about 3 metres from my head) which he's roofed with corrugated plastic. He finished it last week but last Friday it rained all night (seriously, not a moment's respite) and the noise of the rain banging on the plastic kept me awake all night. I'm sure I'll get used to it in time, and it did mean that I could try sleeping on the sofa while watching the start of the 1st test against Pakistan, so it wasn't all bad... :)

Saturday was when the fun started. But before I get on to that story I have to mention my new fireplace which is totally fantastic. I'm only allowed to have wood fires for the first week or so (to allow the brick to dry out apparently) and I had the first on Saturday night. Now all I need is a woman to curl up on the sofa with and it would be the perfect romantic image... :)

Saturday was also a big sporting day. Apart from the cricket England were also playing against the aussies in the rugby union, the argies in the football and the kiwis in the rugby league - all three of which appeared consecutively on the telly. I watched the union game at home as I didn't want to be too drunk or hungover on the Sunday (when I was meeting girl 3 for the first time, obviously) then headed down to my local to watch the footy game and meet up with the boys (and girls). Unfortunately I was the 2nd to get there so had to watch the first ten minutes of the game with just B (he shall remain nameless because he's already served one jail sentence for attempted murder and I, for one, have no intention of it being two) who spent the entire time trying to convince me to give him the keys to my flat for two weeks so he could shag some bird that was over from south africa - in my bed! I said no and he rather ominously said it would therefore be my fault that he had to pay for a hotel instead. The fact that the reason she can't stay at his is because he lives with another woman who's the mother of his child seemed to have escaped him. Luckily for me U turned up at this point with a couple of women who work for him and B was distracted....

The game was fantastic (more so because we won) and I had a good time chatting to U's brother S whom I hadn't seen for ages and K, one of the women who works for U and is a very youthful looked 40-something with two kids (one of whom is 23). B was overheard saying to K - "You must have been stunning ten years ago". Class.....

After several more beers and a few games of pool (where I continued my good run and remained unbeaten for the second weekend running) I had to leave to go for a birthday drink with an ex-colleague. I also got a call from girl 1 inviting me out for drinks with her and some of her new girly mates from sainsbury's. I was torn, but thought with my head rather than my dick and went to see my ex-colleague and buy him a pint or two. Leaving there about half ten I called girl 1 only to find her upset about something and on her way home. Grrrrrr. Then U called inviting me to his house where everyone from the pub had gone afterwards (this is what it must be like to be popular). It's on the way home so I popped in for a beer. I lasted a quarter of an hour before beating a tactical retreat from B who'd piled in the beers and was now upset with me for not letting him use my flat as a shag-pad. Managed to get K's phone number for some reason.... ;)

Back to the flat and girl 1 is upset because she's been (stupidly in my view) romantically involved with her boss at the supermarket she works in and found out from the other girls that a) he's got a fiance, and b) he's cheated on her with other girls about 40 times and girl 1 is just the latest in a long line. I'm not sure what she expected to be honest - it seemed pretty obvious to me! But, of course, I'm not allowed to say that so I cheer her up, light a fire and watch my new Bill Bailey DVD. I retire to bed happy, and inspired by Bill, put an A4 sign up inside the fridge telling girl 1 to take a hint and stop shagging people who are taking advantage of her. Surprisingly, this goes down well on Sunday! I'm obviously a comedy genius....

However, and this is the best bit by miles, unbeknownst to me S (who was apparently on anti-biotics after a mossie bite got infected - and still drinking heavily) had decided it would be a good idea to let B take his car home for the night (S' car also being the family car for his two young daughters). This despite B being almost incapable of standing upright at this point. The next morning U gets a call from S' wife wanting to know where her husband and her car were. S has ended up in hospital with blood poisoning when his arm and leg swelled up in the early hours of Sunday morning and at the same time B reports that the car was stolen from outside his house....

Fast forward to today and I'm told that the accident investigators who found S' car wrapped around a tree (strangely enough just down the road from where B is living) have reported that the car showed no signs of being tampered with and that, in fact, Volvo's can't be driven without the keys. So basically S has lost his car and, seeing as he willingly handed the keys over to a drunk person, is very unlikely to get any insurance pay-out - whereas B, if caught or shopped by S, faces possible jail time for driving uninsured while drunk. I'll be interested in seeing how this one plays out!

Football tonight. My first game since feb so expect me to report a dislocated right knee tomorrow as that's the only joint I've not already crippled playing football over the years!