I'm bored and I've not done this before (inspired by reading Valley Girl's '100 random facts about me' post, and then consequently shamed by her far too interesting life) so here's 10 random facts about me (if you already know any of these then tough):

1. My IQ is 157, this has made me lazy as I've never really needed to work to achieve a comfortable life or pass any exam. It has also garnered me the nickname 'Stats' (because I could work out a ten team league table in my head given the results of our 5-a-side games. I find this highly unfair as surely anyone can do that? And being introduced to attractive women as 'Stats' tends to not work in any way, shape or form.)


2. My cats were originally going to be called Becks and Budvar after my two favourite beers but I reasoned they would get confused every time I offered a beer to a friend (at the time the contents of my fridge would usually consist of about 40 bottles of beer and some butter) so I called them Pink and Floyd instead. I still find this amusing.


3. I started puberty at 16. This late start in my life has never quite been caught up and my utter bafflement around and inability to read sexual signals from women remains to this day. On the plus side apparently my family were so concerned about my late start that they consulted with doctors who recommended growth hormone injections. These are basically cells grown in the lab from the spinal fluid of a poor unfortunate man who was 7ft+ aged 15 and died as a teenager when over 8ft. In a wonderful twist of fate, anyone injected with the hormone developed Creuzfeld-Jacobs disease (of the same type that BSE caused in humans in later years). My family decided to wait it out. I never found any of this out until my mid-20's.


4. I co-owned and ran a detective agency for nearly 3 years. I'm not sure if I'm just a nosey git and it was a comfortable lifestyle fit, or the experience broadened my information finding horizons. Either way, when I wanna find something out - it's found.


5. I don't trust women. I want to, but I've had 'Evil Lying Bitch' engraved on my heart enough times that there's not much space left for anything else anymore.


6. I hate christmas with a passion and I don't send cards and I don't buy presents except when totally necessary.


7. Despite points 5 and 6, I'm going for an expensive meal with a girl I really like (and I trust enough not to check up on anything she's told me) just before christmas. And we're exchanging presents. *blushes*


8. I've never had a job for longer than 18 months. I get bored after 3 months maximum in any job I'm in and look for something else. I'm worried this is also what will happen in any relationship I may want in the future. I've never been out of work for more than a couple of weeks either.


9. I grow trees from foreign climates as a hobby.


10. Amongst other pointless trivia I remember at the expense of anyone's birthday or important business meetings, I've memorised the exact mechanism for manufacturing a nuclear bomb, the periodic table in order, the capital cities of the world and the career stats of Asif Din - a journeyman cricketer who played for Warwickshire in the late 1980's. I have no idea why I know these things, I've certainly not tried to remember them.